- I want to be able to seek treatment for mental illness while being reasonably assured that the doctor will not a) assert that my limited sexual experience means I can’t be certain of my sexual orientation b) suggest a causal link between my sexual orientation and my mental illness (in that order)…
I want to be able to decide whether or not to become a teacher based purely on the job’s own merits, without having to worry about the potential consequences if my colleagues/employers find out that I’m asexual. I’ve seen too many people decide that asexuality must be a “cover” for some repressed immoral sexual desire.
I want to know that I can marry or form a civil partnership with someone from another country and have them move to live with me, or move to live with them, without the fear that the immigration authorities would refuse us because we’re not a “real ” couple.
I want these things enough to labouriously pick them out, letter by letter, on a phone rather than leave them unsaid.
I want to talk about my relationships freely and easily, without having to use a paragraph to explain my feelings. I want easy words.
I want to feel safe in my classes. I don’t want to flinch when someone like me is mentioned. I want to feel my whole perspective is valued in classroom discussions.
I want it to be possible to answer honestly on surveys that question my about my sexuality or my sexual orientation. I am tired of lying because there is no space for honesty.
I want there to be places in my physical community where I can walk into a room and be fully accepted and understood, places where I am not implicitly an outsider or a teacher.
I want to be able to share this piece of myself quickly and easily, without irreparably diverting every conversation I try it in to a fascinating lecture about my personal and private life.
I want to be able to explain that I am not and have never been sexually active to my gynecologist without being condescended to. I want to be able to explain why I am not sexually active without being afraid that my doctor will see this as a disease to treat.
I want there to be resources for people like me without me always having to make them for myself.
I want to know whether an organization of people with minority sexualities will welcome me before I approach them. I want to be welcomed or turned away without having to ask.
I want someone else to explain to my parents what I am so that they can work towards processing that without my having to handle their emotions as well as mine.
I want to never have to listen to someone pitying me for who I am ever again.
I want to be able to run a blog search for terms pertaining to my sexuality without running across people using the word to mean “ugly, sexless.”
I want to speak freely about myself without fear of consequences.